Last night Cady and I got a full 7 hours of sleep, from midnight until 7 am. This is a huge victory! It was just what I needed to get my head on straight (well as straight as my head gets anyway!) The effects of jet lag are no joke. Between the emotions of leaving family and friends in the U.S., the timezone change, and the breakneck speed of life, it’s amazing what a good night of sleep (thanks Benadryl) will do.
The last time I wrote, I shared that my grandmother had passed away. We received the phone call late on Mother’s Day. I spent the next three days listening to counsel, battling with myself and seeking the Lord over whether or not to travel.
Brian was sick. Cadance was finally settled back into life in Uganda. There were so many questions… Would bringing Cady back to the U.S. with me cause an upheaval again? (the answer is yes, but God is good and we can see Him working in her through the grief) I wanted to be there for my mom, but would having to say goodbye to us after saying goodbye to her mom be more difficult for her? We heard there was a travel warning about driving the road leading to the airport. (Yikes!!!) The debate went on and on. I priced flights. I made lists. I prayed like crazy and I cried like I was seriously crazy. Finally, after we took Brian to the clinic on Tuesday (where we discovered that he had a nasty bacterial infection), I said, “You are just too sick. I can’t go.” But when I went to sleep I mentioned to him that I felt like I was making all of my decisions out of fear.
The next morning, after 12 hours of antibiotics in his system, Brian was feeling a little more like himself. He said, “I thought about what you said all night. We don’t live in fear. We live in faith. You’re going.”
I wish I could say the agonizing stopped there, but there was a lot of crying mixed with lots of excitement and frenzy. If we were going to go we had to leave our house by 2 pm. We had no power so we had to use a backup battery and mobile internet to try to get my plane tickets. I charged Brian with that task while I did the most necessary thing… dying my hair. Really. That’s what I felt like I needed to do at the moment. I guess because I couldn’t control anything else I figured I could at least tackle those grays!?
I really wish you could have seen us sitting in the bathroom. Brian was on his phone with all of our credit cards sitting out, trying to make one of them work. I was bent over the tub, washing out the dye in cold water while shouting out directions to Cadance for what she should pack. We just kept moving forward as if we were going, while waiting to see if we could even get tickets.
We kept hitting dead-ends with the tickets. So, at lunch time, I said, “If we don’t have tickets within one hour, we just can’t go. We won’t be able to make it to the airport on time.”
5 minutes later, the ticketing agent called and told us the credit card payment had gone through. We were going!
We were picked up at the airport by Brian’s parents and drove straight from D.C. to eastern North Carolina. We missed the visitation that night, but surprised my parents just an hour before the funeral started the next morning. We made it! God made the way for us.
Cadance returned to Virginia the next day while I stayed with my mother and aunt in NC for the next week and a half working through the endless pile of things to do post-funeral.
We laughed. We cried. We got a little angry. We went from one office to another looking for direction. We reminisced through piles of papers, pictures and cards revealing so much of our family history. We got tons of wisdom and love from cousins who had recently walked through similar experiences. It was a time of bonding for my mother, my Aunt and me. God is so good!
I will never regret going home for this time. Faith conquered fear and I’m so thankful!
Thank you for your prayers for us— your encouraging and sympathetic words. Thank you for your support which allows us to be here serving as the Lord has called, but also allows us the flexibility to be with our families during these challenging times. Finally, a special thank you to the people of Seaford Baptist Church for paying for my plane ticket in full and then some, so that we could more easily afford to go.
We are blessed by a faithful God who comforts us in times of trouble and overcomes our fears!
The pond behind my grandmother’s house
2 Corinthians 1:3-4 “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.”